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I'm feeling a bit down - am I doing something wrong ?

3K views 29 replies 20 participants last post by  Janev1000 
#1 ·
Well today has not been a good day puppy wise. We've had wee everywhere, pooing in the crate whenever he's been in it, plus the 'sick & eating it' thing. He's ripped & chewed up all the newspaper in his crate.
And to top it off, Dexter has been so biting today. He's been hanging onto our ankles, took a chunk out of my trousers & is relentless. We've tried ignoring it, tried the 'ow' thing but I'm worried that he'll scare the children as it hurts when he does it.

How do I stop this behaviour before I feel too depressed. I knew the poos etc would keep me busy but I didn't expect to be feeling scared of a 9 week pup !

(neither of us have had dogs before)
 
#2 ·
Hi Lisa

You have the new puppy blues! We all have had them (more than once!) so please don't feel that you are not managing :). Dexter has found his feet and is now doing normal naughty puppy things. The poos an wee will get better, just be consistent with watching for signs and taking out regularly. :)

The biting is normal puppy behaviour and it is very important to teach your puppy bite inhibition with louds 'ows!'. If the children run away it adds to the fun for him so it is a good idea to teach the children to stand like trees if he starts chasing them.

If he is too excited, remove him from the room for a couple of minutes. Timing him out will give him a bit if time to calm down and it removes him from the people that he wants to play with.

I can't remember what chew toys and things that you have bought Dexter but you could distract him with a game with a toy to stop him from biting. I can never leave paper around as it is Daisy's favourite thing to shred and makes the most unbelievable mess!

Tomorrow is another day :) Keep your chin up you are doing brilliantly. xxx
 
#23 ·
Hi Lisa

You have the new puppy blues! We all have had them (more than once!)

I have the puppy blues today....:( I have returned home after a quick trip to a party shop for balloons for the impending 1st birthday (Daughter not Archie) and Archie has destroyed another part of the floor plant, yet another plastic ball from the ball pool...and one of my brand new wellies! So he's in the dog house and I'm hoping the weather stays nice so that I don't need my wellies anymore, but I'm not hopefull.
 
#5 ·
Yep, the puppy blues! I remember on more than one occasion wondering what on earth I'd done and how was I going to cope! But it gets better and then you wonder how you ever existed without your poo!! I did find it much more tiring than I remembered.. but then I'm older! But ditto to everything that's been said above. Hang in there!
 
#6 ·
Yep I had the puppy blues too! It's just all a bit overwhelming isn't it?

I'm afraid it's a case of getting to know your puppy and finding out what 'punishment' works best for him. Squeaking like another puppy when Lolly bit us too hard just seem to excite her more! I found that holding her mouth closed until she backed away seemed to work for us.

For toilet training I advice a great spray
which you spray where you want puppy to go to the toilet. Lolly would take one sniff after I sprayed it and immediately do a wee. Having success means you can praise and treat him which will hopefully give him the idea of what's required. Also go back to basics taking him out every half hour or so.

But most of all - remember this stage really doesn't last long. It gets easier once you can start taking him out for walks, then again at 4 months or so when his adult teeth come in.
 
#7 ·
Hi

I felt the same for a few weeks, thinking I made a big mistake getting a dog but it does get better! I gave him empty drinks bottles to play with - he loved them..very noisy though! I have a 2 year old daughter and he nips her sometimes, we have had a few tears but he is getting better. We are trying turning our back on him when him jumps up or starts biting and when he calms down make lots of fuss, seems to be working.

Hang in there x
 
#8 ·
Hi Lisa
Our puppy Barney is just over 10 weeks old and we have had a tough day with similar problems to you. I take him in the garden very regularly to poo and wee and every time he will do one or both. Great you may think then promptly he does another wee or poo in the house!!!
As for the biting boy! do they have sharp teeth:eek: Our son is 6 and he is starting to get anxious about the biting and as Sarah says I tell him to stand very still but did need to rescue him from Barney a few times.
I cannot offer you any words of wisdom or help but I thought you might like to know that there is another family going through the puppy blues too.
Things can only get better I keep telling myself with fingers and toes crossed.
Good luck
Tracy
 
#9 ·
I bought a book before getting Daisy as I am a childminder and was concerned about how having a puppy would work with so many kids of different age ranges.

Living with kids and dogs - Colleen Pellar

I found it really useful for ideas of how to get the children to help train the puppy by playing games. It covers different puppy behaviours and different ages of children and is an easy read. :)
 
#10 ·
It was only a few months ago when I was in the same boat, sharp teeth, puppy hanging on legs, arms, ankles, my hands looked like I'd fought off a knife attack :eek:

Well I'm here to say that for the last couple of months things have improved so much that I'm beginning to forget how much I thought I'd made a mistake. So hang on in there and enjoy as much as you can. :D
 
#11 ·
Sorry to hear you're having a tough time :( The toilet training will get much better :)

In regards to biting, I think time outs will work for you. We've always had time outs for our two and we put them in the kitchen, so now if we say to Izzie the oldest 'do you want to go in the kitchen?' she generally stops doing what she's doing (being naughty) & comes over to us & tries to give us kisses :) Bless her, she's so clever!

Poppy not quite so much ;) Just looks at us really cute although is starting to understand the concept but generally it isn't needed for them anymore, just a threat :)

Maybe give it a go? A minute in the kitchen if he doesn't do as you ask first time everytime telling him if he doesn't stop he will go in the ... depending on where you want to use. They like to have human company, so being closed in a room alone is no fun for them, hopefully it will work for you.

Good luck :) x
 
#12 ·
We've been going through the same thing here. There are good days and bad days. Olive is definitely coming in to her "naughty" puppy phase! The first week was so easy and now she is not so easy! What helps me is to give myself breaks. She takes her naps in her crate, with the door closed. This way i have at least an hour without having to think about her at all. I know that sounds mean, but i was finding myself consumed by her and i was starting to resent her. Knowing i get breaks during the day helps me to get through the rough times. If i notice she is really relentless with the biting or excited play i try to take her outside and run her. She likes to push a soccer ball we have around the backyard and she will really get going. I thought i'd hate being outside in the winter, but i've learned to really like it! When we are out there playing it's another time i don't have to be on guard with her in the house. I find it really relaxing to be outside with her and I miss it when it's too cold to be outside.
It's also a really positive play experience for my young kids when we are outside with her because she doesn't seem to bite them as much out there.

What you are feeling is normal and your puppy is normal! I'm guessing if we just hang in there we'll make it out just fine on the other side!
 
#13 ·
Starting to get better

Hi

we had similar 'what have we done' thoughts from 8 to 10 weeks but at 12 weeks things are starting to get better. He's good at going outside - most of the time:rolleyes: ......but can guarantee once a day he'll do something somewhere he shouldn't - I'm really looking forward to out first perfect (no poo or wee in the house) day..........but he's so cute and so much fun it's been worth it.
 
#15 ·
Thank you so much everyone - its comforting to know its all normal. To be honest the pee/poo doesn't bother me too much - its just a pain to keep cleaning it up !

The main thing is the biting - my eldest (who is 10) is a bit scared anyway but I fear he'll be totally put off. And I suppose I worry that the dog will always be this way - but it seems from what you all say it is a phase (who'd have thought dogs were exactly like kids !!!)

Certainly us yelping at Dexter has no effect so I think I'll try the time out now but in kitchen rather than crate.

I have woken up brighter today. I've been to the library to get some more doggie books & the Tesco delivery man has been with peanut butter & soft cheese for the kongs !!!!

I'm going to make sure I get a quiet 10 minutes regularly to collect my thoughts ! Currently I'm drinking coffee & watching Cesar Millan while Dexter has ten minutes with a peanut butter smeared kong in the crate !

One other thought though - if he's a biter, how can I best hold him to take him round the neighbourhood for socialisation ?
 
#16 ·
He is not a biter. It is a puppy thing and he will stop. Don't be scared that you have got an aggressive dog, you haven't! Take him around your neighbourhood and enjoy the attention, you eill probably find he will be so interested in the change of scenery he will stop biting you and start..............wriggling, hold tight! :)
 
#17 · (Edited)
Lolly was a biter - but only with us playfully! She is the least aggressive dog you'll ever meet now - extremely submissive and rolls over to be sniffed by everydog, even a jack russel puppy yesterday!! But thinking about it I've never met an aggressive cockapoo yet! I think puppies are a bit like babies when they're teething. They like to put everything in their mouth and have a good gnash (the only problem is they have razor sharp teeth and babies don't)!!!
 
#19 ·
Lisa hope you feeling a bit more positive today :)

Dont feel down, you are a cockapoo owners, best thing in the world :) :)

I know it is hard in the early days, as puppies are hard work and much commitment, but we are all here to support you and help in anyway we can xxx
 
#20 ·
Lisa - if you look at some of the earlier posts that some of us ILMC 'oldies' have made here you will see that almost without exception we have been through exactly the same thing!!. It's tough and puppies are hard work in the beginning BUT it does get better quite quickly. You will look back on this post in a few Months time and laugh - you will be reassuring other newbie puppy owners of the same thing in no time at all.. good luck xx
 
#22 ·
He probably won't nip while you are out and walking him. I take Olive down to the bus stop and she never play bites with the kids down there. The play biting only gets bad when she is wound up and being outside seems to help with that.

Olive has snapped aggressively at my kids though. They COMPLETELY deserved it and i used it as a lesson on how we can and can't touch a dog. Olive will not tolerate them picking her up and i am ok with that. I'm in the process of teaching them that Olive isn't a doll and they need to stop trying to pick her up like a toy. Even though she has snapped at them when they tried to pick her up she isn't aggressive with them when they play with her appropriately. She's very forgiving!
 
#24 ·
If you have any of Ceaser's books or videos the best calming method is the claw hold on the neck, make a claw hand and hold puppy down until he relaxes then let go. Problem is young children tend to shriek and wave their hands around which is so tempting to puppies! Maybe instill a hands in pockets rule with the children. Unfortunatly puppies test lots of things out with their mouths, I found a rolled up newspaper worked wonders as I put it in Hatties mouth which allowed me to gain control. Things will improve it just needs consistency however when you are tired it is easy to get overwhelmed. It is a dog you are a human and you will gain control stop take a deep breath dont get sucked into games of chase and have a large glass of wine! We have all been there but come out at the other end, this will not last forever. Remember no matter how bad you feel the pup is undergoing monumental changes and is trying to make sense of its new life. Good luck!
 
#25 ·
So glad you're feeling brighter today.

Nipping is a pain, especially with those razor sharp teeth. Do you find he nips more when he's getting tired or over excited. We kept a soft toy to hand so that when Millie started nipping us, we'd shove the toy in her mouth. It would give her something to do with her mouth, whilst still playing and being fussed over.

It might work a bit for you too :D
 
#26 ·
It can be really difficult and I think puppies can be scary, silly as that may sound.

I had some difficult times and these are some ideas I was given that I found helpful.

I spent a little time teaching Bodger the command No Bite (my vet just says NO, firmly), Cockapoos are bright and so it did not take long. One afternoon I played with him and everytime he went for my hands I said, very firmly no bite and moved away and ignored him for a few minutes. I did this over and over again and he has learnt the command. It is still used now every time he puts teeth on skin (he still gently mouths hands given a chance when he gets excited), but however gentle we still say no bite.

With toileting I used the crate taking him out every 15 mins, or immediately after a sleep, or after a play period, 15 minutes after food and every 5 minutes until he went, after drinking and to be honest I watched him like a hawk for any sign but I don't have small children so I did have the time to do this. It is time consuming so you just need to do what you can given your own circumstances bearing in mind those are the times puppies tend to need to toilet. There will be accidents but it will fall into place. If you let him out for a play keep him to a confined area, preferably a cleanable surface and keep taking him out, I think taking him out is better than letting him out, he will get the message, once he starts to indicate he wants to go out you can extend this area but take your time. Eventually he will understand all areas in the house are his bed area and he won't soil them.

I am not sure how often you are feeding him but I was wondering if he is eating a little quickly or eating more than he needs (at one sitting), I understand they will sick back food ( pretty much undigested) and eat it again. Maybe smaller portions in more sittings (if that makes sense) but others may have better advice.

As for the hanging onto clothing I prefer to stop moving and give a sharp no (tone of voice) others may disagree but I have grandchildren and felt my poo must understand he can't do that. He still has a go though so we have to be consistent and they do challenge. Not perhaps being aggresive but trying to be 'in charge' which they don't really want anyway or just puppy play. If it all gets a bit too much give him time out, they hate being ignored and I found he calmed down after a few minutes.

I am no expert and there are many people I am sure more experienced than me but I got there in the end and so will you. Stick with it, it will get better.
 
#27 ·
Thank you all for your continued replies & help ideas. It's really usefull for me as neither hubby or me have any dog experience.

Today seems to be another good day - and when he is cute it just melts your heart :)
 
#29 ·
That is why you got him and that is how he will be when an adult. No one ever knows how much of an impact a puppy can make on family life it really bis one day at a time again don't expect too much and before you know it he will fit perfectly into family life as if he has been there forever. Remember he is having a tough time to.
 
#30 ·
I taught the 'no biting' command too and it seemed to work better than high pitched squeals - especially as he seemed to understand the 'no' word from day 1. The sweetest thing is that whenever he started to bite I would say 'no biting' and he would stop, pause and then give me a lick instead! He still play bites when excited but stops immediately if I say 'no'! or 'off'!
 
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