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Hi there, I’m looking for some advice and hopefully reassurance please.

I have a 7 month old, male miniature cockapoo with my husband and two kids (12&9yo). We have had him since he was 8 weeks and he has been great so far.
In the last 48 hours, he’s just seemingly turned on my 9yo and it’s so upsetting and strange.

On the first day of it, my 9yo was stroking him and he got mouthy (which he does when he gets excited) and we have been training him so when he does that we offer a chew toy and then if he continues we just stand up and turn away as a statue returning when he’s calmed down. My daughter did this, but pushed him away (gently) as he was jumping at her.
He then growled and got snarly and lunged at her trying to bite, which he did but didn’t break the skin. We put him in his pen with a chew to calm down whilst we comforted our daughter.

Later that day she was sat with me in the garden and he came out, happy with good body language loose back, open mouth tail and ears up, he came over to greet us, and I stroked him, he then moved to my daughter and as he did his body language changed and he lunged at her growling and bit her leg (didn’t break the skin)

My husband called him back and he gambolled off as though nothing had happened.

Later on, we walked back into the house and he was happily trotting along before suddenly stopping then again lunging up at my daughter. I reacted instinctively and shouted his name and ‘no!’ And he immediately stopped And ran zoomies all around the garden.

The next morning, he was in his pen at breakfast time whilst we got ready for the day. He made strange high pitched yelp style barks with a low growl at my 9yo when she walked into the kitchen. Later we carefully and slowly introduced him back to her and he was his usual loving self with her and sat cuddling and if anything was more affectionate.

Since then, we have tried to control the situation but from his pen he’s growled at her and then lunged at her whilst on his lead. It’s like he’s suddenly scared of her, and I’ve no idea why. I see him change, his eyes lock and his frame sort of goes stiff.

I rang our breeder for some advice and she thinks he needs more time with other dogs (he’s not really had much other than at puppy class) she thinks he sees my 9yo as his rough and tumble partner and is going too far.

I’m not sure, I’ve got a vet appointment next week to check if he’s in pain (he’s not showing any sign of being) I’ve never had a dog before, only cats and so I’m unsure if this could be normal. I don’t have any friends with dogs who I can ask for advice because the ones I’ve asked have all said they have never experienced anything like this before(!) I’m so worried, I can’t relax in my own home and it’s heartbreaking that my daughter feels so rejected and confused as she loves the dog probably the most of all of us and he’s usually her buddy in cuddles and fun time (playing frisbee, digging and walks)

Any help, guidance or reassuring words appreciated! X
 

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My advice is keep them well apart for now and get a good reward based trainer on board who can come and see what is going on with the body language between them. I don't think for a second it is about him seeing your daughter as his rough and tumble partner and more that for some reason he no longer trusts her and is telling you that quite clearly. With the risk of a deteriorating relationship between them I would get someone in quickly to get them working together again - https://apdt.co.uk/find-a-trainer/
 

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Agreed. It sounds as if the pup thought the light shove was an act of aggression by your daughter and he is now scared of her. Definitely work with a reward based trainer. They need to start building trust all over again.
Make sure that she does not approach the dog in the meantime, so he does not feel threatened and learns that she won’t harm him
 
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