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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
The new love of my life is keeping me awake being really distressed, howling and wining (which to be honest is to be expected and something I was prepared for) I picked him up from a family breeder 3 days ago and have been trying to keep him in a crate and letting him out to excrete about every 2 hours.

The crate lives in the room next to me so I can hear him crying, and is finding it so heart wrenching to hear him upset throughout the night. I know you should not let them out when they are making a fuss (unless you know they need to relieve themselves) but its so hard!! I am terrified I will give the poor thing separation issues and considering he will need to come to work with me this is really bad. The first night I buckled and made a bed on the kitchen floor by the crate! I put him in today while I had a shower and he was howling frantically.

My main problem is there is so much conflicting information. Some people say to take the crate into your bedroom but surely this makes it harder in the future to make them sleep in the kitchen? I am taking the most common info and using that, (for instance making it fun in there and rewarding when he goes in on his own accord,and feeding him in there) but some people say not to close the door and others disagree.

Are there any experienced dog breeders who can give me some advice?
 

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Hello Rose
I don't have the answers but thought you might like to know that you are not the only one! Our puppy is 9 weeks old too and howling at night since last Sat when we brought her home. We have not buckled but it is difficult as she is waking us all up through the night. Part of me is really relieved that she is well (my first puppy died - see my thread 'sick puppy') but it is really difficult as we are all really suffering from lack of sleep. Last night she must have rattled the crate so much she escaped and came upstairs to find us. I guess that it will sink in eventually that night time is for sleeping! She is very stimulated during the day when she is awake as we take her with us to the office in her crate and play with her, so it can't be that she is bored. Good luck to you. I'm just going to keep on with leaving her in her crate in the lounge and hopefully it will work. The only other thing I'm confused about is that we put newspaper in half the crate for her to poo and wee on and the other half is her bed. So when we get her out in the morning she often doesn't need to go. But I think it would be worse to have her do it on her bed or make her wait between 11 and 6. Not sure if I'm right on this. Good luck with your puppy - it'll be worth it in the end.
 

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Hi, there isn't really one 'correct way' as a lot of people do what suits them, we were lucky (sorry) that our boy settled quickly but I think a lot of people feel it is better to have the crate in the bedroom if it means everyone gets sleep and the puppy feels more settled, when they are used to sleeping in the crate I don't think it would be too hard to move it - outside your room, then downstairs ets - I'm sure there are some people on here who have done that and can tell you how it went. I think we would have tried to tough it out, and I know those who do get there in the end, is there a break in the crying at all? it would be better to go to him then although I can understand you may think bliss and try to sleep at that moment.
Bish I'm so happy you have your new puppy, please start a new thread and tell us all about her. Good luck to you both.
 

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I found it agony listening to my puppies crying, thinking how lonely and frightened they were without their siblings. I took advice on here and took their crate to my room. We have all slept peacefully ever since. It doesn't bother them where they sleep now, in fact one of Dexters favourite places is on the front door mat in the hall (away from hubby's snoring!).
 

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What we did with our new puppy Thor (who we just got two weeks ago tomorrow) was put him in his crate in our bedroom around 10:30pm after he has gone to the bathroom several times and let him stay there till 6:00am and then take him out. He cried for the first four nights. First night being the worst. He got better every night. The fifth night he was silent all night long and has been ever since. He has slept in his crate also in our living room all night long. Someone helped me with this from the forum and my breeder gave me the same advice. She also said to take up his food at 5pm and let him go easy on the water late in the afternoon. He's really smart and almost like clock work he knows when it's his last pee for the night and 6 o'clock sharp he's ready to go out. I hope this helps :)
 

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Hi there,
Congratulations on your new puppy, my advise is after now having 3 nights of crying I would take his crate into your room and let him sleep in there until he's settled in his new home, some puppies sleep on their own from night one some take a day or so but others like mine just were not going to settle without being near me, i think it's kinder for your puppy and you will get some proper sleep too, you will still need to get up in the night for him to toilet but once is normally sufficient if you get him to go to the toilet before bedtime. Good luck x
 

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I just want to add that I never once needed to take mine out of their crates for a wee at night, but I went to bed as late as I could and got up as early as I could! They never once messed their crates, although if Bonnie wasn't in my room when she woke up she would 'leak' with excitement when she saw me first thing in the morning!
 

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Hi there, can't really help you but I'll let you know what we did.

From the first night we put him in his cage and put a blanket over it so he establishes that with night night time. He did cry for at least 3 or 4 nights off and on but you have to be strong and ignore him. Get yourselves some earplugs. We set Barney a bedtime of 9pm and every night we say nigh night Barney and cover his cage. I have to admit for a couple of weeks there was mess in his cage but when his bladder grew stronger that stopped. We used to get up with him around 6am and let him out straight away. Every weekend we stayed in bed an extra 30 mins and now at 6 months he sleeps from 9pm till 8am with no mishaps or crying.

I think what I'm trying to say is be strong and he will learn you will return in the morning for him.

Another thing, when you first greet him in the morning make a real fuss over him. If he messes in his cage don't complain at him. He will learn its his bed an he won't want to do it.

Hope things get better for you, this forum is great for advice.
 

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I think you need to see the world through a puppy's eyes. He is in a new very strange place, during the day he has companionship, stimulation and attention from you. Suddenly, at night, he is abandoned and and not allowed to follow you. He is left alone, and scared, so he calls and calls and calls for you his pack leader. From birth he has snuggled with his siblings and mother. Now he is alone. Cut him some slack and put him in your room near your bed. He will settle and in time bit by bit you can put his crate where you want it. We did have a puppy that slept on our bed when tiny. Then she went in a box at the side of the bed. Eventually she was happy to sleep wherever her box was.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Thank you so much for all your advise. That night I had tried to keep him in the kitchen in the crate, but with the door open and a space to wonder around in. It still didn't work, he cried for 3 hours. I took your advise and put him into my room in the crate (door closed) instant peace and quiet! I take it into the kitchen in the day and he does go in there sometimes, but still doesn't like to be left in there alone. Today I had a shower for the first time without him crying. I left him in the crate alone, but in my bedroom and he was fine.

I am however still a little worried that this isn't teaching him to be alone. How long do uoi think it should be before I start moving the crate out of the bedroom?
 

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Rose, as he becomes more confident and secure and settled, you will find he actually leaves your side. Just give him some time. Our puppy Max is 21 weeks today and he is content to find a quiet corner and stay there. If he falls asleep at my feet and I get up to go into the kitchen he no longer leaps up and follows me instantly. Little by little his confidence is growing. If you need to leave him, put him in his crate.....give him something with your smell on to cuddle up to, a treat to munch on, Leave the radio on and just go. Don't make a big fuss, don't say goodbye. Close the door and leave. The calmer you are, the more secure your dog will be.
 

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Hi Rose,
So pleased you got a better nights sleep and you took your little pup into your room to sleep,I think it's so much kinder on them for them first weeks and from what I have heard they are actually less likely to suffer separation anxiety at a later date, as cat53 said you will be able to move him away gradually at night once he's 100% settled in his new environment but you may actually find you don't mind him in your room, I had plans to let mine sleep downstairs too but Beau was not having any of it so I decided to move her upstairs and she was fine from then onwards. Sorry (jhunter) but I really don't agree with the Sticking the earplugs in and leave them till morning....they are like babies and they have only known their mum & siblings, unlike babies they can't wear nappies so letting them out to toilet is a must, they get very distressed messing their beds because as you say they dont like messing it. Yes gradually their bladders do get bigger and its not long maybe a few weeks and then they can go all night without toileting, I certainly couldn't sleep soundly knowing my puppy was crying and howling it would break my heart.
 

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This is only from experience as a kid, not an adult. But its still experience just from a different view point.

I have thought about the "crate" thing. For me right now I have decided not to crate my dog when I get him, even at night. We never crated our dogs for any reason. I use to sleep with our dogs in my bed. Even when they where puppies. Heck my sister was sleeping with one of our cats in her crib.

So you just may want to have the pup sleep with you. LOL Just an ideal... As for separation anxiety as they get older that shouldn't be a problem if you give them a safe environment. Our dogs never had this, they always did well when we were gone. Although I have read for that Cockapoo's are more prone to this. But if your dog has a good environment, this should be less.
 

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Just a little something that worked for us after 2 nights of crying, we put a small travel clock in her crate (it was secure in a doggie hot water bottle cover that someone gave us) and from then on she sleeps from 10.30pm to 7.30am without a sound. I was told it mimics her siblings heartbeats.
 

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I'm affraid we caved after day one.We took away the crate and have never looked back.Malie slept soundly from 10-7.30 ish every night.No accidents on her bed next to ours.Over the last 3 weeks she has chosen to sleep downstairs on the front door mat.I think the best advice is to do what is best for you.
XClare
 

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Thank you so much for all your advise. That night I had tried to keep him in the kitchen in the crate, but with the door open and a space to wonder around in. It still didn't work, he cried for 3 hours. I took your advise and put him into my room in the crate (door closed) instant peace and quiet! I take it into the kitchen in the day and he does go in there sometimes, but still doesn't like to be left in there alone. Today I had a shower for the first time without him crying. I left him in the crate alone, but in my bedroom and he was fine.

I am however still a little worried that this isn't teaching him to be alone. How long do uoi think it should be before I start moving the crate out of the bedroom?
Hi Rose,
We caved after one night and let Malie sleep in a bed next to our bed.Over the last 3 weeks ( she is 5 months old today) she has decided that she prefers sleeping downstairs.I wouldn't worry about her not wanting to be on her own as we have found that by not stopping Malie from following us wherever she wants,she now chooses to take her self off and not follow us everywhere we go.She has also never been a problem to leave.
XClare
 

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"Over the last 3 weeks she has chosen to sleep downstairs on the front door mat.I think the best advice is to do what is best for you."

I can't believe how many poos choose to sleep on the front door mat, I wonder what the charm is?!
 
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